8 Reasons You Aren’t Successful
From Good to Great to Unstoppable. 8 Reasons You Aren’t Successful from Relentless by Tim Grover
1. You don’t trust your instincts
Everything you need is already inside you. You are completely wired with instincts and reflexes specifically designed so you can survive and succeed. You don’t have to think about using them, they’re always working.
Whether you’re playing a sport or running a business, it’s the same concept. You don’t need to schedule a meeting to discuss a decision; you just make the decision. Your instincts become so finely tuned that you have a reflexive response that allows you to attack without thinking.
The most successful people are those with the instincts to respond quickly to anything, without having to go back to the drawing board, watch more film, schedule a meeting, schedule a meeting to discuss what will be discussed at the meeting, or do any of the other countless things people do to put off making a decision.
Trust yourself. Decide. Every minute, every hour, every day that you sit around trying to figure out what to do, someone else is already doing it.
Every dream you imagine, everything you see and hear and feel in your sleep, that’s not a fantasy, that’s your deep instinct telling you it can all be real. Follow those visions and dreams and desires, and believe what you know. Only you can turn those dreams into reality. Never stop until you do.
2. You care what other people think
If you’re aiming to be the best at what you do, you can’t worry about whether your actions will upset other people, or what they’ll think of you.
You are done when you say you’re done, not when people say you’re done.
When you can laugh at yourself and not take every setback seriously, that’s confidence. On the other hand, when someone says something to you that you don’t like or you don’t want to hear, and you allow it to put pressure on you, even for a moment, that’s a confidence problem. When you’re confident, you don’t care about what others think; you can take your mistakes seriously but still laugh because you know you can and will do better.
3. You overthink it
Your ultimate power source will come from the neck up, not the neck down.
Get your mind strong, so your body can follow.
Sometimes you need to step away and get back to that calm, cool place where you’re in total control.
Emotions make you weak.
Get back in the Zone, that deeply personal space where you can quiet your mind until you have no thoughts, it’s just you and your instincts, focused and unemotional. Where you feel no external pressure, just the internal pressure to prove yourself, over and over, because you want it for yourself, not anyone else.
4. You talk too much
A true champion never tells you what he’s doing or what he’s planning. You find out after the job is complete. And by the time you realize what he’s accomplished, he’s already moved on to the next challenge.
Those who talk don’t know, and those who know don’t talk.
The loudest guy in the room is the one with the most to prove, and no way to prove it.
When people start broadcasting what they’re going to do, and how great they’re going to be when they do it, it’s a sure sign they’re still trying to convince themselves. If you already know, you don’t have to talk about it. Talk never goes up in price, it’s always free, and you usually get what you pay for.
5. You’re waiting for a peak
Being the best means engineering your life so you never stop until you get what you want, and then you keep going until you get what’s next. And then you go for even more.
Do. The. Work. Every day, you have to do something you don’t want to do. Every day. Challenge yourself to be uncomfortable, push past the apathy and laziness and fear. Otherwise, the next day you’re going to have two things you don’t want to do, then three and four and five, and pretty soon, you can’t even get back to the first thing. And then all you can do is beat yourself up for the mess you’ve created, and now you’ve got a mental barrier to go along with the physical barriers.
To stay at the top, you have to keep climbing higher. There is always someone right behind you trying to catch up.
6. You’re focused on money
A champion doesn’t think about the money; he just does the work and knows you’ll be grateful for the privilege of paying him.
Champions don’t care about instant gratification; they invest in the long-term payoff.
Just work, because Michael Jordan knew better than anyone else that all the outside stuff was the result of hard work on the inside, not the other way around. Shoe deals and commercials don’t make you an icon. Being unstoppable makes you an icon. And being unstoppable only comes with hard work.
7. You don’t take responsibility
Take responsibility for everything. When something goes wrong, don’t blame others. Never really count on anyone else to get the job done in the first place. Just clean up the mess and move on.
No trainer or coach or expert can make you good or great or unstoppable if you’re not going to do the work, if you’re waiting for someone to make it happen for you. It’s on you.
Once you start blaming others, you’re admitting you had no control over the situation. And without that control, you can’t create a solution.
Have the confidence to say when you’ve screwed up, and people will respect you for it.
8. You don’t hold yourself accountable
Being relentless means demanding more of yourself than anyone else could ever demand of you, knowing that every time you stop, you can still do more. You must do more.
A champion doesn’t respond to external pressure, he puts the pressure back on the guy trying to get under his skin by refusing to acknowledge him. Remember, you don’t compete with anyone, you make them compete with you. You can control what you put on yourself; you can’t control what the other guy puts on you. So you focus only on the internal pressure that drives you. Run to it, embrace it, feel it, so no one else can throw more at you than you’ve already put on yourself.
That’s internal pressure at work, getting on yourself for something no one else would even notice and challenging yourself to get it right. Not because you have to, but because you want to.
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Read all of my notes on “Relentless” by Tim Grover ⬇️
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